Mouse Tails

I was on my way out to the barn to measure our mobile chicken coop; I needed to estimate how many hens it would fit. I had to work hard to loosen the boards that act as the side wall. When I finally loosed it enough to pull it off, I was startled to see several mice scurry about in panic. They all bolted for the nest they had built in the corner.

I thought they were all safely tucked away in their comfortable nest made of duck feathers, wood shavings, and dried leaves, until I glanced over to the opposite corner and spotted two mouse tails.

It took a moment for my brain to understand what my eyes were seeing. But the moment I comprehended the story of terror that must have unfolded behind the stuck boards — I busted out laughing and then called everybody over to share in the laughter with me.

Once we wiped the tears of hilarity from our eyes and calmed down, we set our minds to figuring out how to set them free. We decided to lift the edges of the boards and gently, push their little heads towards the interior. It worked!

One of the two fled to the nest, the other stopped to thank us.

What is the moral of this tale?

Do not try to occupy the same space at the same time.

My January Garden

Every January I have the same dream.

While I’m wrapped up in my blanket sitting on the couch with a mug of hot cocoa warming my hands, and the glow of the fire in the fireplace warming the room, I pull out all of my flower seed catalogues to warm my heart with the dream of this spring, and the beautiful gardens it will bring.

My “January Garden” is always perfect - no weeds, Japanese Beetles, or deer.

Every seed I plant is guaranteed to bloom and all of the vegetables will be teeming with flavor; they are never bitter, pithy, or rotted.

My carrots and tomatoes look just like the photos in the catalogues; absolutely no blemishes are visible.

My “January Garden” flowers remain in bloom all season long, they never fade.

Of course, they never need to be watered because it rains steadily for a few hours overnight (from 2am until 4am) once a week.

You know, just enough to soak the ground to keep the soil moist but well-drained, as all good soil should be.

Butterflies and birds visit my flower garden frequently and they always hold perfectly still until I capture the perfect shot for my blog posts.

Bees visit my garden, too.

All of the most popular native pollinators, the ones that will save the planet, just like the plant catalogues promise me.

Yep, it’s true — but none of them are actually on the flowers while I’m sniffing them, so I won’t get stung.

All of this is possible because my soil is perfect. It is light and fluffy — loamy with no clay.

Weeds do not like my soil and, therefore, prefer to grow in my neighbors’ gardens.

I never need to fertilize, especially with harsh chemicals, because all of the local wild rabbits hop into my gardens and carefully deposit their bunny berries under each plant in the perfect quantity, without munching on anything.

Worms adore my soil and invite all of their friends over for dinner parties.

Of course, the sun always shines on my full sun plants, but temperatures remain at a comfy 72 degrees everyday.

There are never any mosquitoes or chiggers in my garden while I’m working in it.

I never sweat, my hair always looks perfect after I remove my stylish floppy hat, the one that matches my outfit perfectly.

The children never disturb me, the dogs never bark, my cell phone never rings, and nobody ever asks me “What’s for dinner?”.

What does your “January Garden” look like?